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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think it’s heredity. More than likely, when parents don’t agree on childrearing, kids take the easy way out. [/quote]

Between stuff like ADHD, which are very inheritable, and ambition and general attitude, where you learn by example, the family you were born into and raised in, determines a lot of the outcomes.  [/quote]

Didn't read the whole thread, but Carl Jung once wrote that "The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of the parents."

https://www.triplemoonpsychotherapy.com/blog/greatestburden[/quote]

I used to find things like that interesting and intellectually challenging to think about. Now that I'm a parent, I really wonder if any of that crap -- er, stuff -- actually applies. So much of life as a parent is just trying to survive from one day to the next. Just SURVIVE. Is the unlived life of the parent really there, out of sight, influencing the child? Or is it just an integral part of the parent?[/quote]

I have no background in psychology, but from what I've read about this quote, Jung was explaining that many parents have unresolved issues, hopes, dreams, etc...  in their lives ("unlived lives") that consciously or subconsciously get passed on to their kids through day-to-day parenting.  As for "surviving," there's no doubt about that.  There's very little time for the self-reflection necessary to resolve long-extant issues (assuming awareness of them).  The image of a gerbil on a wheel comes to mind.[/quote]

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