Reply to No help with #2... Now what?

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Reply to "No help with #2... Now what?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Millions of women take care of two or more children every single day of the year and have no help.  Why can't you do the same.  The secret is to get organized and not to sweat the small stuff.  Make sure they are fed, dry, clean, and loved.  Everything else can wait.[/quote]

and to 23:17...

[b][b]While I do appreciate your tentative to help, this is not what I was looking for[/b][/b]. It's been 4 years since I saw my mom last, she's never met my first child. I dealt with severe PPD the first time around all by myself and I don't want to have to go through the whole ordeal once again with another child in the mix. I was seeking practical advice on how to get used to the new family and tips on dealing with adding a member to the family and not having people trying to minimize the sadness and despair I'm feeling right now. I know tomorrow morning I won't be feeling this way anymore, this is all brand new news for my family and we're still processing it. Is it really that hard to respect other's pain?

Thanks to all who came with practical advice, I truly appreciate it.

[/quote]

You never said anything about PPD in your orginal post. And what are you asking anyway? You miss your mom and wished she was around. Is that your point? Or are you asking how to organize yourself with 2 kids? It's 2 different things and you seem to dismiss PPs who aren't sympathetic.

The golden rule of DCUM is don't come looking for compassion. 
[/quote]

I know, I know, I should not engage... but here I go...

"What can you tell me to help me feel better about doing this all alone? I'm so upset right now..." was my last phrase. Telling me that millions of people do this every day and trying to diminish how I feel is NOT helpful. I came asking for PRACTICAL advice and I thought my OP was clear on that... I even listed what we already have done to make sure we're ready. Is it really that hard to be empathetic of someone in pain?  :? [/quote]

Not PP you're quoting here. Maybe[i] that is[/i] the practical advice. Stop feeling sorry for yourself and freaking out over what can't be changed. Maybe if you focus on the positive, instead of your disappointments, you'll feel better and less overwhelmed. You have it pretty damn good, so keep reminding yourself. Yes, it sucks that you haven't seen your mother in four years, but that's the risk you take when you live internationally! Hopefully, she'll keep trying and will get an approved visa soon. Also, you're already at an advantage if you know you're at risk for PPD. You'll be able to recognize the symptoms immediately and get help, right? Cry, get it out of your system, and then move on. You have work to do, so get to it. [/quote]

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