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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] He said the mean things at the end, but it’s how he thought if you and your “thing” the entire time. You were always disposable. Therapy will probably help you figure out why you bought into a fantasy.

An affair that lasted "multi-years" is far from a fantasy. Married people need to stop leaning on that to dismiss real people having a real connection and real feelings and real sex. Nothing fantasy about that. It's a relationship whether you like it or not.[/quote]

Yep, it was only real sex and that’s not a relationship.  It’s not knowing each other’s friends and families, planning family vacations, taking care of each other when sick, owning a home, walking the dog, joint accounts, and on and on.  It’s just sex and talk about a fake future, without access to 90% of the AP’s real life.  So yes, the “relationship “ was a fantasy.[/quote]

NP. I’ll go one further.  The AP doesn’t have access to ANY of the other AP’s real life, because the part the AP has access to is a fabrication. Sure you might know true details about the AP, where they live or work, how many kids they have, where they’ve been. But it’s all presented in a colorful fabrication to make the AP look better than they actually are.  It’s like an Insta page, but not for the general masses. It’s one specially curated for the AP for the sole purpose of getting the AP to produce much-desired positive feedback, validation and admiration. Stuff that the AP is undoubtedly lacking at home and/or has such an insatiable appetite for it that he or she is compelled to go outside the home to get even more.  So, this is not at all a relationship. At best it is a desperate attempt to bolster their own ego. At worst, it’s a power play to bolster their ego with no concern for the impact to others, including the AP and their respective families.  [/quote]

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