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[quote=Anonymous]13:08. My point was that maybe your wives are too secure in the marriages currently to think you'd ever leave. So consider making them jealous. I was unhappy for a long time with XH but for a different reason (basically I was a single mom long before we separated). Had lots of resentment, arguments over it, depression, and then I shut down. Finally decided I would just focus on finding happiness via other avenues but ultimately stay. Ended up losing those 20 lbs of postpartum weight (DC was still an infant), hanging out at night with recently divorced or unhappily married GFs (had local family for coverage), dressing up to go just about anywhere. Had a convo online with a friend who mentioned a guy I dated way back and how he was such a great guy and why didnt I end up with him instead. I mentioned that I had wondered sometimes, but stopped entertaining those thoughts. X found the convo but I didnt know it for awhile, but he changed and suddenly became an involved father (and still very much is). This was a man who was extremely confident that I'd never leave no matter what prior to that (had even said so before). Unfortunately, damage was already done in my case, but it could work for some of you.

I think its crummy that any of you have been put in this position. I would be resentful as hell too. What is the plan once your kids are out of the house? If you live in DC, it'd be pretty hard not to get joint custody if you wanted it. [/quote]

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