Reply to Job offer overseas vs 50% child custody

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Reply to "Job offer overseas vs 50% child custody"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You can go to court and fight for full custody but that would be pretty terrible for him and the kids.  Or, just leave the kids with him and take the job.  You can have visits on holidays and summers. [/quote]

Sounds like I have to persuade him to let me go…[/quote]

You mean and take the kids with you?

I mean, speaking as a father, my answer to you would be I support you going and will work with you to give you as much opportunity to see the children as possible, but I would go to the mat in court to prevent you from taking my kids with you. Your choices are to not take the job and remain close to the kids or take the jobs and see the kids sometimes. Those are quite literally the only two choices. The other one where you take your children with you? It's not happening. And that IS a hill I would die on.[/quote]

Lousy dad. All about you.[/quote]

You are a c*nt.[/quote]

The C word is uncalled for.

I am a Mom whose ex works a lot overseas, and on occasion he has spoken about applying for a job overseas. I used to have a career working overseas, so I get the longing to go back and the dearth of jobs in the US that offer comparable pay, responsibility and life experiences.  Had I trusted my ex more (or at all), I might have been open to looking for tandem postings even though divorced.  But, ex was unstable and unreliable and had lied to me A LOT, which meant the relationship necessary to do that wasn't there.  Instead, I have full custody and facilitate visitation with the kids several times a week, and he goes on vacation with them for a week once a year.  In truth, he doesn’t want more custody.

If he tried to fight me for custody of the kids in order to take them overseas, I would fight him with every penny I have.  And it would not be all about me. The kids have school, and friends, and relatives here, not to mention educational and medical needs that can’t really be met overseas.  I think living overseas is a wonderful experience, but not at the expense of crappy primary relationships.  This is why I never sought a job overseas for myself, and why I never would fight to take them overseas even though I have full custody.

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