Reply to Appropriate child support for this situation

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Child support is not payment for caring for your kids.  You are not a babysitter.  It is to help pay for the basics.  [/quote]

No, but if it means i am using my sick pay, taking time off for kid stuff, not quite able to devote 100% to job like other parent is, that is a measurable negative economic effect.[/quote]

Yes, you are right. The system, however, does not care about this because it believes that one parent (usually the woman) should provide all the resources to raise a child for free.

You have identified the structural sexism in our current child custody/child rearing systems.  Women still do the vast amount of child reading and use sick and vacation leave to do so because we have no paid family medical leave, or we dial down our careers or leave the workforce. This in turn affects our career opportunities because we are less available for work opportunities and we are perceived as being less committed to the company and our careers.  Because of that we don’t get promoted or given pay raises as much.  Later in life, after the kids are raised, our lack of career success further hobbles us because we are perceived as being behind the career track because we were not capable instead of merely being unavailable.  Because we have lower earnings and are less often receiving benefits, we have lower retirement resources and more often end up in poverty.

Your only way out of this is negotiating an amount above child support minimums with the non-custodial parent. Good luck with that.

I am also a parent with full custody of the kids. Right now the father of my kids is on a 6 week overseas assignment that he gave me 5 days notice about.  His career is great because for the entire life of my kids, he has been able to take multiple overseas work trips for weeks at a time on short notice. My career?  It collapsed because he does not provide me with the same support when I have similar opportunities. 
[/quote]

What are you ranting about?  You don't get paid to take care of your kids.  You have full custody.  So, since you have full custody, he can do what he wants when he wants as he doesn't have custody.  That was on you for demanding full custody and not having him share custody.  That is what full custody means.  He is under no obligation to provide you with any support and at best, he gets some visitation.

Child support is not a salary.  If you need more money, get a better job.  Simple.  Go back to school in a higher paying field.

[b]We have paid family medical leave.  [/b]We have paid leave.  With most professional jobs you are allowed sick/annual leave and you save it for when you need it.  If you choose to go on a two week vacation then need two weeks off for illness too bad.  [/quote]

NP but the poster you’re responding to is spot on in her assessment of the weaknesses of our current system and how it disadvantages women. You sound like a jerk. Who is the we you’re referring to? Many jobs in the US do not have that.[/quote]

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