Reply to Would you drive 5 hours for a baby shower?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't understand why the nonpregnant people are not the ones travelling. [/quote]
Because they’re the ones hosting the shower.[/quote]

I can't believe the family would want a heavily pregnant woman to drive 5 hours for a baby shower. It's really not that important of an event and typically incredibly boring.[/quote]

Okay, let’s go with that. DH’s family is generously welcoming the baby into their extended family. If OP treats it as an unimportant “boring” event, I hope she’s not surprised when more unimportant, boring events like birthdays and graduations and holidays in the future of her child’s life get treated by DH’s family as the unimportant, boring events that they are.  Please remember this post when OP comes back in a few years because DH’s family is more focused on other kids in the family then on hers.  This is one of those actions-have-consequences moments.  [/quote]

This is silly. Are the ILs expected to travel 5hrs every year for a birthday? I wouldn't think so. Baby showers are awkward and not fun for many of us. I wouldn't want to attend one under these circumstances, but I also hope my family would know me well enough to not host one so far away. Honor the baby when it's born and go spend some quality time with the ILs then. This is performative, relationship building once the baby is here is way more meaningful.[/quote]

Are you insane. It’s a lot harder to travel with a baby than it is to travel while in your 6th or 7th month. And there will always be some excuse - baby is sick. or don’t want to expose the baby to this or that.

If OP truly wants to have a good relationship with ILs and if her pregnancy is going well and her OB doesn’t have an issue with it, she should go. If any of those things are not true then she should not go and hopefully her ILs will understand.[/quote]

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