Reply to Am I Awesome or Terrible?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]First time: “Hey, you forgot to move the bag and animals got into the trash. I cleaned it up, but please remember next time.”

Next time it looks like he’s going to forget: “Hey, you forgot last time and I had to clean it up and it was disgusting. Can you please do it now?”

Second time you have to clean up: “Larlo, you forgot to take the trash to the bin again, it’s not fair to make me clean up that horrible mess.”

Honestly I’d leave the mess for him to clean up unless it’s actively dangerous (like chicken bones and you have a dog). If you have to do it, you say “Larlo, you keep forgetting and the animals make a huge mess that I have to clean up so the dogs don’t get hurt. I’m really frustrated. Something needs to happen differently.”[/quote]

NP - I get this approach except the trash will attract rats and vermin and it's completely unsanitary.  Plus what if they have guests???  Trash all over the deck is one of those things that needs to be cleaned up ASAP.  Her husband sucks.[/quote]

So why can't OP take over the garbage disposal job and trade a chore she hates with her husband. He does not want to do this chore and it's turned into stupid work for both of them. How freaking hard is it for OP to take thie one over - and give her husband the chore of loading the dishwasher or whatever.[/quote]

I get what you're saying PP (and I am none of the above posters in this chain) but I think this takes it too far. I think spouses should work together towards equitable distribution of work but sometimes there is a spouse who will not hold up their end of the bargain. And this presents a very difficult situation for the other partner.

I don't think OP should roll over and accept this. But she is of course missing a wide variety of choices that are substantially less psychopathic than destroying belongings he cares about. [/quote]

To me it's overly rigid to insist that he keep doing a chore that he obviously hates and is also making OP's life more frustrating. Maybe we just have a lucky setup but garbage is simply not this dramatic - you take the bag out and put it in the can. If OP finds the chore to be equally easy, I would really recommend she take it over and save herself this idiotic maddening battle. I don't know what she can extract from DH so it's not just her taking on more labor and him lazy-ing himself into an even easier ride but surely there is SOMETHING.[/quote]

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