Reply to If your Son-in-law confided in you about marriage troubles, would you talk to your daughter?

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Reply to "If your Son-in-law confided in you about marriage troubles, would you talk to your daughter?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, please come back! We need to know: what is the issue??

The 75%\25% breakdown you gave indicates to me it’s not purely your DD causing issues through addiction problems, late onset schizophrenia, something very serious that requires intervention.

If it’s that she can be a real b1tch sometimes and is a total nag about cleaning the house I don’t understand why SIL would come to you.

Please give us something to work with here.

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OP here. I don’t really want to elaborate further because the judgmental harpies have already swooped in and started flaming and projecting their own lives into this situation.

I appreciate what the African and Asian posters said, because it’s the type of culture I am from. Family can be annoying or intrusive, but they can also be a BIG help if you let them in.

It’s not addiction or abuse. It’s differences related to childrearing and decision making that I have been witness to during my stays with them in the past, and seem to have come to a head. Anyway, I might do what Indian PP said, and not necessarily try to fix the problem (because I can’t), but go to them and handle the kids for a couple of weeks so they can take a breather and hopefully get some time together to resolve their issues.
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Maybe if you provided additional, relevant cultural information in your original post, you would have gotten different responses. Something to think about in the future. [/quote]

I am from a culture where family is more heavily involved. Please do remember that it is still possible to be intrusive and overstep your boundaries even in our cultures. I think it is a good idea to help support your family by offering childcare etc. Regardless of what you do, you need to support the marriage and ask both your SIL AND DD what they want or need from you. It sounds like you already have the idea that your daughter is at fault for the marriage issues and I think this could lead to her feeling resentful and betrayed by you if she were to find that you were not considering her side of the story.

By not explaining what the situation is you are not giving any of us the opportunity to help you. Good luck, I really do hope for the best for your family.[/quote]

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