Reply to Are There Any Red Flags Here?

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[quote=Anonymous]Have spent the past year with my 11 year old DD who developed full blown anorexia. We live in such a diet culture and skinny and judgey world around healthy food and looks that it’s hard to read some of the advice and perspectives who want to act like being this concerned about food and working out related to looks at this age is ok.

The goal is normalize your daughters eating so she’s not so obsessed with types of restrictions or not eating things she used to eat. (Anything is fine in moderation!) and getting her on a physically and mentally healthy path for life. things like baking and thinking and talking about food is a signal she wants it but won’t let herself have that. Anyway. I’d suggest reading How to Nourish Your Child through an Eating Disorder. It sounds scary but it’s usual as just a blueprint for normalizing eating - and you don’t have to label if your kid has a “real” ED or not. At age 11 have her focus on any physical activity that has a social element to it and do not do the workout videos. It’s not developmentally appropriate and reinforces a msg of exercise as dieting and not because it feels good and is healthy and fun at this age. Have her eat her “fear  foods” as a sometimes food - ie avoiding and breaking restrictions is key to not going down the ED rabbit hole. Do it now. Most people who develop a full blown diagnosed ED have a genetic predisposition that collides with cultural and other factors. When the body goes into deprecation that can be a huge trigger - think about losing your rationality when you’re really hangry. I don’t think your daughter sounds like where mine got to - or what I’ve seen and read about and learned about in various treatment programs at this point as a full blown ED. But there are signals of disordered and unhealthy “healthy” rules and restrictions that if not checked can lead to a life of disordered eating and feeling bad about herself and having an unhealthy relationship with food. [/quote]

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