Reply to Are There Any Red Flags Here?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Honestly OP just reading this is huge red flags.  She is 11.  Most 11 years olds "work out" by being involved in sports, biking the neighborhood, going on hikes with their families, dog walks, etc.  Your daughter is by herself watching youtube workout videos.  That alone is a red flag.  She is well on her way to disordered eating at a young age.  [b]The whole baking something that is long, complicated and aesthetically pleasing can be a sign of an eating disorder[/b].  The cutting out types of food IS a sign.  So while she may never get to full flown eating disorder she is on her way to a terrible relationship with food and most importantly her body.  Nip this in the bud now![/quote]

She is involved in a sport (diving), which is not exactly exercise intensive, and she had to start it, because her injury prevents her from doing what she has done for years (and I think that the kind of work she has to do for diving is helping with her injury).  She used to do martial arts, but had to stop because of her injury.  She has limitations on the type of exercise she can do because of her injury, and bad feet.  So for instance, hiking/dog walks are difficult.  She loves to bike and swim, both of which she does for fun, but those are weekend activities.  She is not watching YouTube workout videos by herself, I help her choose appropriate workouts, because I want to be sure that it is someone that pays attention to form, so she does not hurt herself.

I am curious about the bolded.  We both enjoy baking, and as a general rule, we don't just make simple cakes or cookies (except banana bread; that's a staple, to keep bananas from going bad).  For instance, for Christmas, we baked and decorated a yule log - sponge cake, whipped cream filling, ganache covering, chocolate bark for decorations, meringue mushrooms, sugared cranberries and rosemary, etc.  So what she chooses to bake are things that often have multiple components, or interesting technique.  She loves to decorate especially (artsy kid), and eats what we bake.[/quote]

None of that is alarming because she isn't afraid to eat it, and there are no signs she purges it. Sure, keep an eye on things, but my goodness people on here are overboard. Let's see we have a normal weight child interest in health who like most girls and many boys cares about her appearance too. She wants to avoid table sugar, but eats a well rounded healthy diet. She does enjoy baking elaborate things, but will eat what she makes in a reasonable portion-not binging, not restricting. She exercises daily,[b] but *gasp* has not chosen a DCUM approved form of exercise,[/b] but if you take out video and add oh I don't know volleyball on a team, you may get DCUM approval. Sorry, but this thread has gone off the rails. In a world where our kids are likely to have a lower life expectancy than we have due to being sedentary and eating crap, DCUMers are ready to send a kid to early intervention for making healthy choices and actually confessing that she like most tween girls cares about looking good too. [/quote]

OP is asking for opinions, and people are giving their opinions based on their experiences. Many posters have even shared that they were like OP's daughter at that age.

You can give your own opinion without being snarky.

if you are a therapist or in any profession that deals with children/adult with eating disorders, give OP concrete resources instead of trying to downplay other people's experiences. Nothing in your response shows that your opinion is more valuable than the others, so give it respectfully or back it up with something concrete instead of being dismissive.

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