Reply to I Am Constantly in Tears

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]Also work on your boundaries. Let her know you will not be spoken to with disrespect and all conversations end when that happens. Then walk away when it does. If you pay for your child’s phone take it away if they are nasty to you. You can get to a better place where your teen is not controlling your emotions but it will likely take working on yourself.[/quote]

Agree with this and all PP who posted similarly.  It is fine to recognize that being a teen is hard, offer to find a counselor in case she wants an objective third person to whom to vent, but emphasize that family members do not treat each other nastily and if she does it again, then the phone, rides, allowance ---pick one or multiple---will be taken away.  Need to make sure your spouse is on board with this because if Dad sabotages then it doesn't work.  Look her coldly and calmly in the eye and say in a very low hiss, "And if you do not believe me young lady, just try.me.out"

Given what you have said, you probably will need to take stuff away at least once in order for it to sink in.  Don't threaten unless you follow through.  And expect an explosion, followed by the silent treatment, when you do.  Stay strong and ignore theatrics.  It will pass.

Teen brains are growing/developing as fast as toddlers.  Think about when she was 2 and threw a fit when you set a limit.  You are engaged in the same type of testing behavioral pattern.[/quote]

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