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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know someone with NPD. Everyone "yes"'s her to stay on her good side, because when she goes into rage mode, she tends to stay there, so her "friends" stay off her radar, and make her believe they are on her "side".  Good times. [/quote]

Is she diagnosed? I knew someone like this but I don't think she was diagnosed. It was very intense and there was basically a personality cult around her because people felt compelled to tell her how great she was and to stroke her ego all the time, but no one actually liked her and would say terrible things about her behind her back. It was confusing for me. Part of the reason I wound up fading out of that group is that I didn't understand why people didn't just stand up to her, or at least just set some basic boundaries.

I still don't get what the pull was with her. They say narcissists are often very charismatic, but I don't think I would describe her that way. It was more like she was very good at manipulating people. Like one of her best skills was knowing exactly when to start acting hurt or left out, and also how to do it in this almost childlike way so you felt maximally sorry for her even though nothing was wrong and no one had done anything to her. Maybe that's a form of charisma? More than anything, she reminded me of my mom (who grew up super Catholic and has the Catholic mom guilt act down pat). I never thought "Oh, she's so cool, I want to hang out with her." I only ever thought "Oh no, what if she is upset with me -- I better do X so she doesn't get mad." It was weird and once I realized it was happening I was out of there. [/quote]

Vulnerable/covert narcissists are generally not charismatic.[/quote]

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