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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Guy here.  If its a wife that is the low fitness spouse you can’t change it.  Asking them to take better care of themselves will only lead to self esteem issues and never really move the needle.  Women get fit for themselves first - she has to want it and enjoy the process.  My ex-wife put on 60 lbs in her 20’s (we never had kids).  I tried every way that I could to be a good example.  Ultimately, she had other issues - she was a serial cheater and was becoming an alcaholic.  We got divorced.

When I started dating again, being with someone that I was attracted to and who was enjoyed fitness was one of the higher things on my list.  I’ve been remarried 17 years now and we both make time for each other to stay fit.

If the low fitness spouse is a man, tell that fat-f*ck to dust the cookie crumbs off his t*ts and hit the gym - you can’t f him any more.  [/quote]

I think a spouse can be a motivator or inhibitor to their partners fitness level. Positive reinforcement works wonders. Also acting like you don’t care can be a detriment. I lost 40 lbs and my husband doesn’t seem to care either way. I really wanted to be more attractive for him and myself. I definitely get more male attention in general now. I really wish DH would notice or tell me I look good. He says he loves me both ways. I was exercising really hard, and I’ve backed off. If he doesn’t care what I look like, why should I?[/quote]

Agree. I lost about 20 pounds 6 years ago, and DH never commented.  No, that's not true. He didn't like that I'd lost the weight and I think was actively trying to sabotage by buying chocolate and treats. But I DO care what I look like an how my pants fit. I stay fit for myself. My DH clearly doesn't care what he looks like.[/quote]

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