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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My H are not selfish so we both agree that when the other become too ill to care for the sick spouse will go to a care facility. We will make sure the other is cared for but not do the caring for.

I think it is selfish to expect a spouse to be a nurse. Love, honor and cherish, not become a nurse. Just like I did not vow to be a cook and he did not vow to fix things around the house.

I would love if he visited me but even that can become a burden. I have watched it happen with friends.

We do not want to take away our ability to provide time, love and energy to our children. I would rather my H spend his efforts with his children and grandchildren.

[/quote]

Agree. I don't have the mental/emotional/physical capacity to help nurse my parents if they will need help in old age, so I definitely don't have it with DH. I've also told him that if I were to ever have a health issue that would preclude us from being intimate, he has my permission to step out. [/quote]

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