Reply to If you married someone you don't love, why did you do it? How did it end?

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Reply to "If you married someone you don't love, why did you do it? How did it end?"

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[quote=Anonymous]What do you mean by "don't love" ? Like you don't like or enjoy spending time with the other person? You don't have emotional chemistry with that person?

I do think that romantic love is a distinct  emotion that you either feel or you don't but it's also a spectrum. Many times, people only think of the high end of the spectrum when they talk about love. But you can love someone without being madly in love with them. That's still love and it's still enough to sustain a lifetime commitment.

The guy I was madly deeply in love with would've have been a terrible husband for me (personality differences, different values/life goals, etc). I know that I would've ended up divorcing him. Otoh, dh and I have compatible personalities, values, and life goals. We have common interests and we enjoy spending time together. I don't feel the same sort intensity for dh but I still love him and I love our life together. We've have been together for over 25 years and I do think our compatibility has actually deepened our love for each other. Barring extraordinary and unusual circumstances, I would never leave dh.

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