Reply to DS is a Magnet for Crazy

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If you believe Imago therapy we subconsciously find ourselves attracted to what was normal in our childhood. My mom has NPD and then I married one.

So it looks like your son is just accidentally repeating patterns and you are crazy, OP. [/quote]

Sad but true. I had an absent father and married an absent husband. Regret it daily.[/quote]

Very true. I kept dating jerks like my father until I realized there are quality men out there. It’s a hard pattern to break but entirely possible.

OP the commonality of all of these women is that your soon is choosing to date them. Stop making excuses for his poor choices, he is not a victim. From these posts you sound like a meddling busybody who needs to step out.[/quote]

Op here, I agree that there is something that my DS is doing that is drawing in women with mental illness. I am trying to give him some feedback on what he is doing wrong. DS shared the details with me because he is frustrated and wants a healthy relationship with a woman.  I am not meddling, or setting him up with women, but I would like to help him change.

I would like to hear from single mentally ill women to hear their perspective on dating.[/quote]

There isn’t going to be a monolithic perspective in part because people with mental illness are still people with unique personalities, interests, world views, and moral values. So even two people with the same diagnosis may have different philosophies about dating. There are some really good mental health forums outside of DCUM where people discuss dating and marriage. You might be surprised to know that the issues are often the same as folks who have no diagnosed mental illness. People still want more intimacy or more space, crave a variety of partners or take solace in monogamy, fight over the dishes or whether to have another child. [/quote]

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