Reply to Give me permission to just not visit my dad this Christmas please

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Give me permission to just not visit my dad this Christmas please "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People need to read the whole thread which include op’s updates. I get it op - I have a dad who is married to someone I don’t enjoy spending time with. But it’s knee surgery and your dad is relatively young. I understand he’s probably in a lot of pain right now and is getting ready for his surgery but you are completely overwhelmed. There was not one day without a doctor appointment that he and stepmom couldn’t have driven up to visit you guys so that you, his daughter, gets a break? He really has doctor appointments on Saturday and Sunday? I think the way you originally framed it we all assumed your dad was elderly and alone and getting ready for open heart surgery. I’m not trying to be callous - I’m just looking out for you.[/quote]

Op here. Thanks for this! I didn’t expect to get as hard of a time as I got so I appreciate your post. I am struggling with an anxiety disorder and depression, but even without those issues I still find this time of year kind of sucky and overwhelming.

There’s lots of other facts I wanted to chime in with, but it seemed irrelevant once I fully committed to going to visit.

DH is on board as long as we get a hotel. It’s just hard-our little one doesn’t handle car rides well, we have a dog I’ll have to kennel (this will also entail a vet visit), etc etc. I don’t know. I guess it’s just me but yeah I find all of this while working full time and taking care of a 17 month old to be exhausting.
[/quote]

OP you seem seriously depressed. Why don't you open up to your dad. Tell him you are suffering, that there is something wrong with you right now. This level of exhaustion is not normal and maybe he could understand if you are very open ? I agree that I was picturing an 80 yo and was about to tell you to go but he is young, surgery is no same level of risk and on the other hand you seem really sick and you need to get better :(

That being said: I have never suffered from post part un depression. I don't know if avoiding someone you love is going to feel like a welcome break or will actually not improve your well being by adding guilt. I know that when I suffer from anxiety the idea of moving is exhausting but it is not moving that actually makes me worse, when I manage to get out of the door I never regret it. May be the same for you?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics