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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I totally understand what you are saying.  As a child everyone had such high expectations for me.  I was smart, got great grades, and was told I would be very successful in life.

Now I recently turned 40, have struggled with secondary infertility for years (had one child easily then could not have a second), and never had much of a career.  I work part-time and SAH part-time, and make $15 per hour in a job that just requires a Bachelor's degree.  My parents are embarassed of me, both about the secondary infertility and about my complete lack of a career.  I never lived up to their expectations (never became a doctor like they wanted (and I also wanted).  I view my life as a series of failures.  At least I have a stable, happy marriage (15 years), live in a beautiful, well decorated home, and a wonderful, healthy child.  But other than that my life is a series of failures.

I graduated high school with honors and went to an Ivy college.  Had too much fun in college, decided to drop pre-med, and studied abroad a lot, also had fun dating.  I graduated with honors, and took a year off, where I waitressed and had fun living in a new city.

Then went to law school (which my parents pushed me into, I did not want to become a lawyer but they insisted). I hated every minute of law school, but graduated with honors.  Ended up working a series of underpaid non-legal jobs after for a few years.  Got fired once from one of those jobs.  Failed the bar exam twice (never ended up passing).  Got diagnosed with ADHD (which explains a lot about my lack of focus and inability to choose a career path for years).  Never made more than $30 K.  In my late 20s I decided I did want to be a doctor after all.  I did a post-bacc pre-med program (taking all the science classes, got As), and then took the MCAT twice.  Applied to 25 med schools.  Got in nowhere.  Re-applied a second time after re-taking the MCAT.  Got in nowhere.  My self-esteem was totally crushed.

In my early 30s I went back to school for a master's in another field that seemed like the best fit given that I did not want to be a lawyer and that I could not get into med school.  Worked in that field for a few years, then got pregnant and had a very rough pregnancy with hyperemesis gravidarum, so I resigned from that job.  Had my child.  Was a SAHM until my child was 2, then took a part-time job not relating to my field, where I make $15 per hour.  Love the job, have been there 4 years now, but it's not career-oriented.  Now that I can't have a second child I am going to go back to work soon in the field I got a master's in and work full-time for a few years, as I really liked that field.  It's not prestigious or high-powered, but I do like it and it's a good fit.

Anyhow, as you can see, my life is one big failure.  Everyone, including myself, had such high expectations for me.  But what I've realized is that I think this is true for many people.  Many people had high expectations for themselves and then life happened, and they had to change directions/paths for whatever reason.  It's the rare person who had a goal and followed that goal exactly, and ended up exactly where they thought they would be.[/quote]
I wish that we could be friends!  Your life sounds an awful lot like mine!  :)
[/quote]

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