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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband doesn't beat me, but he's cheated, he's dishonest, he has some substance abuse/mental health issues, and he's pretty controlling and emotionally abusive. I'm considering divorce but know this can be so harmful for children. Which is worse? [/quote]

Divorce.  It will be hard for everybody, including the kids.  But it is better than bringing them up in a toxic household.  By the time I left, XH had gone from bullying and verbally abusing me to starting to do it to the kids.  He still, three years later, can't stop doing it to me, but once I left he got a lot better with the kids.  They have a much better relationship with him now.  There are times I wish something could have worked instead of the divorce, but he absolutely would not change.  I tried everything, even all kinds of individual and joint counseling.  I often think I stayed too long, and I talk to my daughters all the time about making good choices in dating (they are just starting to get to an age where that is relevant).[/quote]

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