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Reply to "Parents together unhappily or divorced - which is harder for kids?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP. How unhappy are we talking? If it comes down to being sad that you're not in a high quality relationship but by and large your spouse is reliable and a decent, reliable person, I say stick it out. Accept your spouse. Treat them like any other family member who you love and care for. If you lower your expectations in this way you can find immense happiness in your life. Life is not all about romance. If you keep ruminating about the one thing that is missing from your life of course you're going to be unhappy. [/quote]

The specific problem a lot of people have is: by and large spouse is reliable and decent, is a good parent, and has a good income... but the sex sucks or is non-existent. What then? Accept a life of no sex or crappy sex "for the children"?

It is hard not to "ruminate" about that particular "one thing" (sex) when it's missing.[/quote]

I get that it's tough. But the chaos that would ensue from breaking up a home over that is reason to deal with it. Everyone hopes they'd be that special case where they met someone new who is fantastic and brings them happiness until they are 90. That is unlikely for most. People go to jobs they find boring day in and day out because they have to pay their bills. How is it different? Both in your career and your marriage you do have some control to improve it and make the best of it. That is my view, anyway. When you stop harping on what you can't change then you find opportunities for happiness you didn't know could come your way. [/quote]

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