Reply to I can't afford to pay for my son's graduate school. He is in high school, BTW.

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Reply to "I can't afford to pay for my son's graduate school. He is in high school, BTW."

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[quote=Anonymous]This is a very sad string of posts.  The most impactful gifts we  can provide children is a good education and freedom from being financially burdened by needy parents later in life.  Of course that is going to necessitate financial balancing.  If the two of you could bring yourselves to focus on your DC first, the three of you need to establish a way to meet  and discuss decisions on an ongoing basis.  Your DC will change throughout high school and college.  There has to be a way to adjust to that change.  As a divorcee, I understand the acrimony between the two of you whether warranted or not.  If this is impossible to override, then as a mom, I would say make financial decisions that you can support on your own rather than exist in an environment your son will find unstable.  That will affect your DC more than having to make do with a second choice school or loans.  We made a choice to bring our children into the world, we owe them as much stability as we can provide.  I understand what the two of you are fighting over but courts or not, you can't control another person.  And he can't control you.  So make the choices you can afford and if he wants to offer up more to support a dream whether that be before, during or after college, he can commit separately to your DC (which is likely more palatable for him than committing to you).  I'm so sorry that the three of you find yourselves in this situation.[/quote]

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