Reply to SAHM’s - anyone successfully convince DH to support their staying home long term?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]SAHM are pathetic. At home doing the unpaid labor their husbands don't want to do. Who wants to spend their days cleaning house and grocery shopping?

I know so many super liberal SAHMs in DC who are all up in arms about their daughters' future reproductive lives while they literally are stepford wives modeling for their daughters how men have oppressed women for generations and [b]the woman lap it up like they have won the lottery because they can take yoga at 10 am [/b]before the pediatrician appointment.[/quote]

But what if they genuinely [i]want[/i] to be able to take yoga at 10 am instead of going to what they consider a tedious, demanding job?

That's the thing. Not everyone wants the same thing. I don't want to work. I know that sounds bad but it's the truth. I consider myself lucky that I don't have to.[/quote]

have you asked your husband if he would like to go to yoga at 10 am?
[/quote]

He’s semi retired so he could if he wanted to. He’s playing golf tomorrow.

Listen, everyone’s experience is different. I come from the tech world where everyone is about FIRE. Many people keep working after that but it’s different when you know you have the money to say eff it at any time.

What I’ve learned is that when people come into money, they usually quit their demanding jobs. If they stay in the same field, it’s as investors, or they work on passion projects, or do hey consult. But most people give up the daily grind.[/quote]

So you really don't belong in this discussion.  Neither you nor your husband are working full time and trying to raise a family.  Why don't you butt out?[/quote]

Why should I butt out? I’m a SAHM too. [/quote]
[b]
DP.  
I don’t know.  These threads always seem to assume that:
1). No women want to quit their jobs unless they are lazy, lack ambition, and have no self-respect
2). All men DO want to quit their jobs, no matter how ambitious they are, how much they love their job, or how much of their identity is tied up in their job title
3). Men need to be protected from these lazy women who are making them work.  
4). If part of the reason a woman isn’t working is because she is taking care of everything at home, then that is her own fault.  She should have married better.  
5).  Even if she married a “bad man” who isn’t contributing to household chores and childcare, this man still needs to be protected against this evil, lazy woman who is keeping him from retirement.[/b]  
[/quote]

New poster. You nailed the way these threads tend to go. You're exactly right. There's a powerful, ugly recurring theme on all these forums where SAH women are painted as lazy vampires sucking up men's life force and money, and no task any SAH woman does is really a contribution of any substantial kind.

[/quote]

Yes!  I realized this on one of these mommy wars threads.  The OP was one of the “what do you even do all day?” posters, dismissed everything SAHMs said they did, and then later revealed that she and her husband were saving for an early retirement and planned to retire when their children were in middle/high school.  This, apparently, was fine and not an issue.  
So, the question wasn’t, “what do you do with yourself all day?” but “how do you justify taking advantage of your poor, overworked husband?” 
This is why pp with a retired husband was told to “butt out.”  There is also no concern about the laziness of divorced women who receive child support and continue to SAH with their children.  
I don’t know why there is all of this concern for other women’s husbands.

[/quote]

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