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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sorry--have BTDT.  Have been with my child seizing while heart rate dropped to ten beats a minute wondering if the EMTs would ever make it in time with their Narcan.  This may not have been your absolute low point, but it was mine.

I have told no one about this or the addiction problem other than immediate care providers.  Child has made excellent recovery and is in college getting nearly all As with heavy STEM course load.  The planned career path would be challenging with a history of drug use.

I suppose I could have unloaded on everyone I know that but for Narcan I would have a dead child or some of the worst of the addiction period but it would have been profoundly unproductive.

I would have lost my child's trust--which ultimately, as child liberally acknowledges, allowed me to pull child out of addiction.  Think about it--this is your child's health problem; it really isn't yours to share.  Beyond that, what good would it have done? There are way too many people out there just dying to hear the worst about your child so they can feel better about theirs and you can bet none of them believe in redemption, of which my child is living (emphasis) proof.  [/quote]

Firstly, I'm thankful that your child has recovered and is doing well.

Honestly, I think we're mostly in agreement here, especially when it comes to getting the child necessary medical help.

It seems like we're debating a really tertiary point as it relates to the recovery process, and the conversation is muddied on the anonymous board because it's hard to tell who is who.  I'm not sure who was advocating "share your child's health problem with everyone"--I agree that it doesn't seem necessary.  My point of contention arose with the poster that said "protect your family and child's reputation" and the level of importance that some posters seemed to place on their child's job prospects down the line.  It would never occur to me to "unload to everyone I know..." about the issue, so I'm not sure how that even came up.  With that said, I also think it may be indicative of the type of company you keep and circles you run in if you were to confide with a close friend about your situation, and then would have to fear for your child's career prospects a decade down the line. Or that you surround yourself with people who are dying to hear the worst about your child....I feel sorry for you, and mostly your child.  I also fail to see the concrete connection between a teenage health issue and how it would completely damage their career prospects down the line, assuming they've recovered and stabilized.  Medical records are sealed, employers don't see high school counselor records etc., and there are STEM jobs all across the nation and world.

I do acknowledge and appreciate, though, that everyone's situation is different and those experiences shape their views on a topic like this, so I'm not dismissing yours as invalid.

Our situations also aren't apples-to-apples...I am the poster who went to one of the MOCO W schools, who saw lots of kids struggle with addiction with opiates.  My best friend, an extremely high performer and all-around likable guy, started the cycle of addiction in HS, stabilized in college, and then got back into it post-college.  Contrary to what you're very concerned about, he easily procured a job at a top consulting firm (due to his college accomplishments) and by all superficial appearances, was doing well.  When I uncovered the depths of his relapse (he broke down to me, desperate, scared, physically ill and addicted), I advocated for an intervention with his family.  Guess what there first question was: "what about his job?"  And that was the reaction of others who heard about the situation..."wow, I can't believe he's going to mess up that opportunity."  They didn't seem to understand (or care?) his situation was dire and a matter of life or death, and unfortunately the situation ended in the latter as he passed away.  So when I read about kids in similar situations, and people (especially parents) bring up job prospects and reputations, it really strikes a nerve and I can't help but think about misplaced life priorities and how the hyper-competitive, pressure cooker, superficially focused DMV environment contributes to these problems.

I do appreciate the conversation and wish the best for you and your child moving forward...here's to a happy, healthy, and fulfilling life.[/quote]

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