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Reply to "What mattered with your kids in the long run?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Teaching them from a very young age that if everything is equal then nothing is special. That fair does not mean everyone gets the exact same thing; fair means everyone gets most of their needs met at different times and different ways. Don't fight over food. [/quote] Sounds like gibberish - or a convoluted excuse not to make the effort to be genuinely "fair"[/quote] You should read Siblings Without Rivalry - they expressly talk about how important it is to get away from "fair." You give kids what they need. I have an adult friend who has complained that her brother needed a TV, so her parents gave her a TV too - even though she wanted something else. I'm a NP, but it's worked for us. OP, I think laughing with your kids and being light-hearted (when I could have been angry) has worked well. I have had to make an effort at this, but after 13 years, it's coming more easily. [/quote]
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