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[quote=Anonymous]A year ago, I would have of course-- if he is a nice, stable guy, then  date away. But then...

My BFF married a guy who was in the system because of a druggie and mentally ill mom. He didn't even get a HS education, but was one of the nicest, kindest people I knew. He became a SAH Dad to 4 did and she got a high powered job and supported them. They were so happy and in love after 20 years of marriage.

And then, something snapped inside him one day. He became paranoid and aggressive, and abusive towards my friend, and mean to the kids. She found out he had had a perscription drug problem for years.  He is now diagnosed as either bipolar or schizophrenic. He is not treatment compliant and she has had to take out restraining orders and have him placed on involuntary psych holds. She wants to help him and salvage their marriage so badly, but nothing is working. She is planning for a divorce.

Maybe this is anomaly, IDK. I have a sample size of one  But mental,illness & addiction are highly heridary, and maybe some people really don't get over childhood trauma.  But watching this unfold, has changed the way I think.

If Imwere you, I would see red flags. [/quote]

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