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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I highly recommend two books by John McKinnon: THE UNCHANGED MIND and TO CHANGE A MIND.  McKinnon offers a really compelling model for understanding what he calls the &quot;global failures&quot; of troubled teens: how those problems are rooted in a basic immaturity in their approach to life.  He argues for a family systems approach that involves work on the teen's part (building inner resources and consequential thinking/planning) AND work on the parents' part, what he calls &quot;recognition&quot; (understanding and validating your kid's needs and challenges) and limit-setting.

I understand your frustration.  Few people with behaviorally typical kids can understand what it is like to have a challenging one--and the extra burdens that such a kid puts on parents to create a really fine-tuned approach to parenting.  (It's exhausting, I know.)[/quote]

THESE are great resources that I haven't read before, thank you. Same subject, different approach it looks like. It reminds me of a text I read regarding a teens brain and how it's physiological structure impacts behavior; it expanded upon the already-known fact that a teen's brain in under-developed, but it gave a deeper understanding as to maybe why a teen thinks the way they do, make certain choices, or in the case of a teen with mental health issues, be inhibited further by their own physiology. It might be by Michio Kaku, but he for sure authored a similar book if it wasn't him.

And for everyone's comments about our parenting: what makes you think we HAVEN'T been involved in the therapy; what makes you think we HAVEN'T made changes to our parenting style(s); what makes you think we HAVEN't tried EVERYTHING we have been instructed to do by the therapists? YEARS this has gone on....we've read the books, we've taken the classes, we've done the exercises, we've made the changes, we've received individual therapy for ourselves.......And maybe we have tried everything we can therapeutically before we have to resort to a pharmaceutical solution........ And now we are EXHAUSTED. [b]&quot;He argues for a family systems approach that involves work on the teen's part (building inner resources and consequential thinking/planning) AND work on the parents' part, what he calls &quot;recognition&quot; (understanding and validating your kid's needs and challenges) and limit-setting.&quot;  [/b] &lt;----- this is what we do, BTW. So please continue to tell me what a shitty I parent I am since I am frustrated beyond belief with the therapeutic community in this area, and continue to fuel your own sanctimonious self-righteous ego by posting anonymous passive-aggressive insults instead of helping. News flash: a child with mental health needs doesn't ALWAYS equal &quot;Bad Parenting.&quot;

[/quote]

You sound vile.   :shock: [/quote]

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