Reply to Another holiday with Step-families and it's just the worst... either stay married or don't remarry!

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Reply to "Another holiday with Step-families and it's just the worst... either stay married or don't remarry!"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP back.  I agree much of this is just something I have to deal with and btw I do and have for my ENTIRE life.  I said right up front this was a vent.  I do believe that in more cases than not however, step families are very tough and it's not because anyone is so terrible but I really do feel their is a significant difference between my bonds with my steps (between mom and dad remarrying I have 4 step brothers, 1 step sister, a half sister, and my full bio bro) and have been with these people (only the half sis is younger) for 30 years!  I don't think its at all fair to say I didn't try to have bonds.  Of course I did.  I didn't know any different.  However it is different.  It just is.  Somehow things just feel less sincere.

Part of the trouble is that both of my bio parents have spent much of my life privately complaining about all my step sibs and showing preference to my bro and half sis and I in a way that made the natural bonds never really natural with my steps.  I know they were wrong to do that and in many ways I think they do too now and want to make up for it by pretending now that we are all adults that we all get along much more than we do.

IDK, I just had a really crappy experience and now find all the forced interaction annoying and depressing.  I can do my own thing but we all live near by and my parents hold the holiday events at their homes and if I don't go I am the one who misses out on my parents and my kids don't get to participate with their grandparents.  There is no good answer but I do think DH and I are planning to try some holidays on our own and maybe take a trip.

If you are the remarried parents just lose the rose colored glasses will ya and try to give your kids a break on the blended family events. [/quote]

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