Reply to I was "ghosted" by my boyfriend of almost a year....

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hey OP, I also got ghosted on recently by a guy I dated for 7 months. He dumped on Valentine's Day via text. No real reason except "I'm going through some stuff."

Absolutely no contact for two weeks, then a couple of I miss you's. Nothing else. Very sad and hurtful. [/quote]

Can't believe I'm saying this cause it makes me feel so old, but is this a generational thing? I'm 45 and can't imagine this sort of thing. [/quote]

He's 43 and I'm 40. So I don't think so.  :shock:  :cry: [/quote]
Not PP but my goodness this makes it so much worse to me! No excuses for him. You dodged more than just a bullet OP, you dodged a hail of semi-automatic gunfire! Seriously, don't even look back on this one.[/quote]

I miss him anyway. He had a lot of issues actually but I tried hard to make it work. Now I'm just accepting he's not coming back....[/quote]
I understand but next time don't try so hard to make something work. I'm. It being flippant and it sounds counterintuitive but it's true. If you have to work *that* hard to make something work with a fully grown man and its only been a year then that means it's not right for you.[/quote]

This is very true.  My former boyfriend used to make me so mad to the point where I quite literally smacked him (didn't hurt him, but still) - I had never smacked anyone, screamed at him (I will not get into it all but trust me he was something).  I disliked who *I* was becoming with him and I really started to dislike who he was.  Some of the stuff that he did was beyond ridiculous.  Yes, we had some good times the first couple of years but after that I stayed with him ???  I don't know why.

Long story short I broke up with that guy.  And I mean cut off all contact, once and for all.  Done. Best thing that I ever did for myself.  I dated other guys and had fun.  And then my now dh and I got serious - over 25 years later and I have not smacked or screamed at him once.  In fact, we really do not disagree that much and we almost always come to a quick and easy agreement on the big things.  Being together has not been hard work, it's been the most natural thing in the world.

Looking back, that first boyfriend wasn't a horrible person we were just incompatible with very different goals in life.  Hopefully someone else appreciates him more than I did, lol.  Op, if you two were having a rough patch not even a year in...that simply did not bode well.  I hope you find someone who isn't so much work.  [/quote]

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