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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You are getting a lot of unfair comments.  My wife is a SAHM.  A lot of women become SAHMs without knowing it is a choice they would make when they are single.  My DW is a lawyer, so she has earning power.

The number 1 factor is YOUR income.  You need to make a lot of money so your future wife's decision whether SHE wants to stay home is made without regard to money.  [/quote]
+ 1.

Most women want to stay home but can't because their spouses do not earn enough.[/quote]

Ooh, please link to the source for your statement that "most women want to stay home." I'd love to see it![/quote]

Check out the stats on SAHMs. It is U shaped which means it goes up tremendously once the person with a job starts making a lot of money (say, 500k +). Rich wives have always opted to do their own thing when they can. Some have "hobby" careers, like a little boutique, but they don't expect it to make any money. Some volunteer extensively.[/quote]

Thanks for looking at SAHMing so cynically.  My dad was a big law partner.  My mom SAHMd.  She made his career earning lots of money possible.  She wasn't laying around eating bon bons.  She was busy taking us to schools, sports, monitoring homework, taking us to medical appointments, showing up for our events, hosting parties and playdates for us, paying bills, doing all the grocery shopping, meal planning, meal making, meal clean up, [b]supervision of all household staff[/b], maintenance of all family relationships, and being caretaker of all when my Dad traveled for work, hosting business associates, etc.  My mom worked as hard as my dad for his Big Law salary.  He never would have been able to put in the high number of billable hours required for Big Law partnership if my Mom hadn't been picking up the slack.  She's never been able to "do her own thing" unless she squeezed it into the little time she had when she wasn't serving her husband or kids. 
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What was the staff for, if mom was doing all the work? 
Your mother's generation is pretty different from what I see now--which is that most of the partners at DH's firm have spouses who are also professionals and who do not SAH. Some might work part-time, but most are also practicing attorneys, quite a few physicians, a handful of professors, some who work for major not-for-profits, etc. We are able to do this while our spouses manage to make partner. While it is true that these professions are generally more flexible that biglaw, they are unmistakably professional careers. I think it's a matter of being efficient with time, using household help strategically, and very importantly, having a spouse who works in biglaw who is genuinely committed to spending time with his family. If you have a SAH spouse who is not efficient or have a lawyer spouse who can't figure out how to schedule a calendar to make time for family, then you probably do need a SAH. This is especially true once you have kids who are all in school full-time, then SAH is nice, but definitely not necessary.
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