Reply to I would like to give my 6YO a lump of coal

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Reply to "I would like to give my 6YO a lump of coal"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]

People don't understand what it is like to have a kid with horrible behaviors and how you can lose it.

I do understand what it is like. My 6 year old has ADD and I have to tell him the same thing about 100 times before he actually complies. I screamed at him yesterday and asked him why I had to repeat myself 100 times before he would actually do what I asked him. But in the end, I was wrong for freaking out, and it helped nothing. Giving him coal or threatening him about Santa is going to help nothing. The only thing that may help is staying calm and imposing appropriate consequences calmly. It is annoying and frustrating, but as the adult, I have to help him change and deal with the situation.

NP here. My 7yo has ADHD, anxiety, ODD, and a severe LD. He can alternate between being the sweetest most sensitive kid in the world and yelling "you're a big bully!" at me in the morning when I tell him to put his socks on. I think I know a little bit about parenting a difficult child. Parenting a difficult child is a lot easier when you act like an adult yourself, though. Stop escalating the situation and stop trying to "win" by getting in the last jab or, in this case, hurtful rhetorical question.

Kazdin is a good place to start or with Ross Greene's book "The Explosive Child". I think you seriously need to think about the values you demonstrate vs. what you demand. If you value respectfulness, then treat everyone, including your 6yo, with respect. [/quote]

I'm not sure why you are copping such an attitude.  I'm not OP, and I admitted that I lost my cool with my child and that it was unhelpful.  No need to be snippy.  [/quote]

I'm not sure if you're talking to since me collapsed three different PPs into one, but on the chance you were ...

I wasn't responding to the OP losing their cool and I don't think PPs were either.  I was responding to the OP losing their cool, making a snide comment to their child, and then casting all of the blame on their child.  If that is typical of their interaction things are only going to get worse.

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