Reply to DS struggling in the first few weeks of college, and it's killing me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well I will go against the grain and not suggest counseling yet.

[b]Having a panic attack isn't really horrible.  It happens. [/b]

It's been 2 weeks.  And I can understand for someone who is used to being popular and had not had the experience of being the one to introduce himself, or make an effort that all of a sudden realizing that yeah, you are going to have to work at socializing can be rough. I think it's ok if he feels sad and even depressed for a short time. It's something he has to work through. If it goes on longer than a month, then yes, look at counseling.

Social issues aside, you may also want to consider if he might just really be homesick and miss the familiarity of home and you taking care of him and it's hard for him to express that to you.[/quote]

Um, no it doesn't.  If this was truly a panic attack, it doesn't just happen.  And it is horrible.  The person experiencing can feel like they are literally dying.  What's not a big deal is going to see a counselor on campus.  It certainly can't hurt, so why wouldn't you?

I don't think you driving up there will help.  You will have a nice meal or whatever and he'll feel good to be with his mom and then you'll leave and he'll feel the loss of you and feel crappy again.  Just let him push through it.  I had a rough transition to college and it took a good 3 weeks to warm up.  I basically didn't eat anything for three weeks because I was so homesick.  Eventually, I made friends and got into a groove.  He'll find some like-minded people.  It will just take a bit of time.[/quote]

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