Reply to Husband of 25 years tells me he thinks he made a mistake by marrying me

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I say this to my husband all the time. No big deal. You're over thinking it. [/quote]

I also say this to DH all the time. I also say that we probably would not still be married if it weren't for the kids. I actually feel like this quite often when I am mad or having a bad day.

DH knows I love him. Even when we were dating, I would say we should break up occasionally. [/quote]

I can't imagine ever saying anything like that to my husband.  What is he supposed to do, how is he supposed to react or feel when you say such a sh*tty thing to him?  Just because he "laughs" it off doesn't mean he thinks it's funny or o.k.  Maybe it just makes him work all that harder towards finally being done with your tired azz.

[/quote]

It's like when people tell their spouses how fat or ugly or worthless they are. It's not that they're verbally abusive or a shitty person, it's that they're just *so brave* to be able to tell the truth all the time.[/quote]

PP here that you are criticizing. DH knows that I think that he is handsome and highly intelligent. He is also an amazing father. I do not think he is a good husband. He has acknowledged that he puts no effort into our marriage because he is stretched thin between work and the kids. It is what it is.

I don't verbally abuse DH. I get fed up, boil for a few days, weeks or months and then explode. DH will only change for a few hours or days after he realizes I am super mad. If I'm just normal upset, he could care less. Yes, we have issues. I know this. He knows this. I have suggested counseling. Then he thinks he is smart enough to be the counselor, acknowledges his flaws, suggests date nights, romantic getaway, buys me something expensive, marriage improves for a short while and then repeat.[/quote]

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