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[quote=Anonymous]Give in other ways besides money.  Help them research disability, medicare, SS and other gov't assistance.  Sign them up as much as possible for these things.  If you are helping them, it needs to be clear you have a say in how they run their finances.  Don't just funnel money to them.  So that might mean they need to move to a small apt and sell their house.  Your MIL might need to work more hours, things like that.  Any money you give has strings attached and make that clear.  Offer to pay for them to visit a financial counselor (with you there, of course) to work out a new budget and ways they needs to change.

They might find you so nosy and annoying they refuse your help.

You and your DH need to be on the same page about this.  I've constantly told my DH we will not support his sister (who is a MESS) when she comes to us.  I know she will, it's only a matter of time, and I will not do it.  He knows this, I say it any time something with money comes up with her now.  His parents bail her out all the time now and once they are gone, I do not plan on filling that role.  My one gift would be to pay for a financial counselor.  [/quote]

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