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Reply to "Carolyn Hax column: MIL doesn't understand why DIL is upset"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a MIL multiple times, I can say this as fact, no matter what, you're damned if you do and damned if you don't so it's best to don't because the snotty rude bitches called DIL will hold a grudge. It's best not to form ties with those she devils. Be polite and when they do ask for help just say no. I give my daughter and her kids all the attention now and mail the other kids a gift. I seriously bend over backwards for my daughter and have a very tight relationship with her kids. I make it happen. I tell my son in law I love him like he's my own. I treat him like a King, ALL for my daughter. I make their lives easy. As easy as possible. I'll go so far as to say I love them more than the other ones. It didn't have to be this way but it is. When the DIL's kids get older and seek me out, I will tell them why their mother was on medication and how rude she treated Grandma. I will also explain to each one in a letter why we didn't leave them anything when we passed and how their mother helped in that decision. My sons will see my daughter and her kids get the spoils we worked for. The boys can thank their wives for that. DILs ? You think you keep your husbands away but you are wrong. They call when you aren't around. And boy do your husbands bad mouth you. Mom will always be HIS best friend. HA HA. Actions have consequences. So go ahead and laugh, go ahead and be nasty, go ahead and play alpha bitch. We MILs will have OUR day ! [/quote] It's obvious from your post that you aren't very bright or well spoken...and I'll venture to say not very educated. [b]I'm going to bet that your DILs are much more accomplished and you are terribly threatened by that.[/b] Do yourself a favor and invest in yourself...take classes in something that interests you. Devoting yourself to being a professional mother to your adult children is unnecessary, unwelcome and a little bit sad. There are ways to be a member of the family (mother, grandmother, MIL) without needing it to completely define who you are. [/quote] THIS. To grow old and be so bitter, nasty and glaringly jealous is no way to grow old. Gosh MIL, even your friends see right through your angst about DIL being in the family now. MIL, what are you so afraid of? That your ugly will come to surface? Too late for that, apparently. [/quote]
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