Reply to What's the Point of Chasing Marriage and Kids, Really?!

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Reply to "What's the Point of Chasing Marriage and Kids, Really?!"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]That's the thing, I don't want to just date. Like most people, I see myself in a long-term monogamous relationship that is fulfilling.

Unfortunately most women in my date range (+/-10 years) either have kids or want them. So sometimes it feels isolated and like I might lose out on a potentially solid partner just because of this.

I can give or take on the question of marriage although I see no point of legalizing a relationship if there are no plans for bringing kids into the world.

However, is it wise or fair to compromise on something so serious as having kids? Regrets further on, or will I suddenly have an epiphany once they arrive?

OP[/quote]

I agree with those who say that so long as you are upfront with what you want, there's nothing wrong with it.

The only anecdotes I have concern two men who were similar to yourself.  They did indeed find nice women who wanted to be in a relationship without marriage or kids.  Unfortunately for both these men, after a few years, the women left to pursue other people.  Because there was no actual marriage, it was a lot easier for them to leave.  I mention it because these two guys sound similar to yourself -- they didn't want to marry because they saw potential divorce to be a hassle and costly.  I think they didn't realize that one day it would be the woman who wanted to leave, not themselves.[/quote]

Forgot to add -- both these guys found it hard to get back into the dating scene after spending a long time in a monogamous relationship.  One guy was in his late 40s and the other guy was in his mid 50s.  It's not that there wasn't any available people -- it's just that the pool of people who didn't want to marry and didn't want to have kids was a lot smaller, and seemed to include a lot of women with a chip on their shoulder (according to them).[/quote]

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