Reply to I can't sleep: what's going on in your relationship? Anything you want to unload about?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I love my husband, who is an incredible person, father and has been my best friend for 10 years.  I am simultaneously infatuated with a good friend from work who is also married, but his marriage is failing.  I never thought I would have such strong feelings for someone who isn't my husband.  I won't act on them, but it's pretty consuming and is wearing me down.  [/quote]

If you know about your friend's failing marriage you are probably already in emotional affair territory.[/quote]

Yes, I guess I am.  I mean he told me once and then I sent him an email a few days later saying that we can't let our conversations take that turn.  We haven't discussed it since, but I happen to know things haven't changed.  EA's are really tough when you work with someone and are in the same work group.  I'm trying really hard to keep things right, but my thoughts are really intense.[/quote]

Back away from the cookie jar.  Do not their problems mess up multiple other lives.  This is why guys hate their wives have "good friends from work" who are dudes.  Unfortunately this happens all the time.  Don't let it happen to you (and your husband, kids, friends, etc.).  No "good friend from work" is worth that.[/quote]

Thank you for this.  If there is one thing that DCUM excels at, it is tough love.  Gotta love the strength you can access from an anonymous forum.  Any other tips or reminders to step away??[/quote]

Infatuation isn't real. It's fun, and exciting and easy because it doesn't have real world problems. You're not disagreeing about how to handle disciplining your kid, or being annoyed because DH is snoring, or dealing with him leaving his dirty laundry all over the floor. If you were married to the work guy you'd have all the same boring crap in that relationship and it wouldn't be glamorous anymore. On the other side, you have shared goals, history, dreams with your husband. You are a family. The work guy is not your family. He's a blip of a distraction. Don't trade a good thing for a temporary rush.[/quote]

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