Reply to The AP is a female physician in our community.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is the OP.  i understand my issues with my husband. i understand that im not a petfect spouse. I undertand if it wasnt her, it would have likely been someone else.  Even if she has less tha 2% culpability in the fallout of all this,  i really am weirded out by this petson's profession of "helping and healing" people, considering the foreseeable harm that resulted. I don't think I would have had as much of a hard time wrapping  my head around this if her profession had been for instance selling washing machines.

To the PP, clearly you are here to be mean.  What's wrong with you?[/quote]

OP, like others have said, I'm sorry this happened to you.  My husband cheated on me as well, and we also have a child, so believe me - I know how it feels.

What people are trying to tell you is that the other woman's profession is irrelevant, and your fixation on it is not helpful for YOU.  Fixating on her, feeling extra-wronged because of what she does for a living, is not doing anything good for you.  It's not helping you move past the affair for your own health and well-being.

The answer to "how do I get past this" is: you decide to stop fixating.  You can't control anyone else, but you can control how YOU feel and respond to others and situations. You may need the help of your therapist to get past the fixation, but you really should work on doing so for your own emotional health.  Yes, you've been wronged, but the best way to feel better is to focus on yourself, NOT the other woman.[/quote]

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