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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I get it.  I honestly would draw a line about the presents simply because I don't want my kid to be an entitled jerk.  I'd say, "MIL, your generosity is remarkable, and we appreciate how you go out of your way to buy lovely things.  We have agreed to limit gift giving to birthday and Christmas, though.  Would you please agree to refrain from gifts other than at those times?"

If she does not agree, the next time she does it, say, "Phyllis, we have told you that we cannot have gifts except at birthday and Christmas.  We will not make a scene in front of the child to upset you both, but if you do this again we will not visit again/invite you again until you agree to follow our request."

As a stepmom, I do think it's really harsh and wrong that you classify Her differently because she is not biologically related.  She is doing her best to love your child, even if it's not your style.[/quote]

We've tried telling them to limit the gifts and they don't.  I just feel like she is teaching the opposite of what I want to teach, and my kids are young and impressionable so they are getting spoiled. My daughter lately has been asking "who gave me this?" and usually the answer is MIL. She just is playing a starring role when I feel like she should be playing a smaller part in our holidays.  She even is trying to claim the role of Santa.

And someone else commented about the candles. She couldn't find the candles, so I just said don't bother. It's not like I said take those candles off the cake.[/quote]

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