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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I offered. She says no. We just bought the house 10 months ago. She's not willing to do anything radical like that. I would certainly be reluctant to, as well. [/quote]
Just wondering why you didn't think these things through. I know a lot of couples who saddle themselves with this expensive lifestyle and then have children and feel utterly trapped. [/quote]

[b]I think couples don't realize how they will feel after having kids[/b].  My husband and I are buying a home we can afford on one salary.  [/quote]

This is very, very true. I am unsettled by DCUM's general tendency to bottom line things without acknowledgement of the complexities at play. The whole "suck it up" thing is one of those phrases that is completely appropriate for very specific circumstances.

If OP's wife is depressed, "suck it up" for a year can sound like a death sentence.

Also, where in all of this is voice given to the very valid point that PP has made here- we evolve when we have kids. We definitely do not stay the same, and there is no way to anticipate all the things that you will feel once that new person is in your life. There are sacrifices we are more than willing to make for that kid that we could not have necessarily guessed at.

Thank you PP for posting regarding what you decided to do. It demonstrates an active approach to solving a problem.

OP, downsizing and cutting costs ARE options.

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