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[quote=Anonymous]OP, maybe your DS just liked the idea of having a lot of money, not that he was going to buy something with it.  Some kids just like the idea of having money.  Maybe it makes them feel grown up.   If money is tight, then giving him an allowance is not really possible, is it.  At 10, he should be old enough to know that stealing means going to jail even if it's stealing from family - not that you would call the cops on him - but just so he knows that stealing is not just morally wrong, but also against the law.

My kids have lied to me. I don't always punish them when they lie.  It would depend on the lie.  When they do eventually fess up, I tell them why lying is bad, and that if they continue to lie to me, I will never trust them.  I tell them it's good they finally told me the truth, but I will probably eventually find out about their lies (kids 5 and 8), so it's always better to tell me the truth earlier on than for me to find out later because then I will be more upset and punishments will be harsher.  They seem to kind of understand that as they are more often willing to tell me the truth after some prodding.  And for the 8 yr old, I tell him as he gets older, he will want more freedom and for me to trust him more, and for me to do so, he needs to be straight with me.

However, if my DS stole $60 out of my wallet, yep, I'd spank DS.   I spank my 8 yr old DS for serious offenses to let him know just how serious that offense was.  Stealing $ is definitely serious, even if it was $1.  Lying in an of itself is not as serious, but it depends on why he lied.  Sometimes, no amount of just talking and telling your kids why something is bad is going to be effective.  I've asked my 8 yr old why he did something bad even though he knew it was wrong and he was going to get punished for it.  He'll say because I don't think about that. That's because the punishment he usually gets isn't that painful.   Kids are impulsive and don't always think about consequences.  But in some cases, they MUST think about the consequences to stop them from this behavior, like stealing something from a store.   So the consequence should be painful enough for the kid to think and stop.  Teaching them morality and punishment for bad behavior should go hand in hand.

Seriously, would parents not punish their kids if they fess up to a lie?  Is that what I've read on some of these posts?   What would make the kid stop lying if they know that they won't get punished? According to some posters, by punishing your child after they confess you have broken the trust your child has. Spanking itself doesn't break a child's trust in a parent.  If that were the case, millions of people for hundreds of years would have had no trust in their parents who spanked them.  My DH and I were spanked as kids. It didn't break our trust in our parents.  That's just silly.  If that doesn't work on your kids specifically, then by all means, don't spank. But don't think that all kids are the same and what doesn't work for you doesn't work for others.  Even within the same household, one type of punishment works on one kid and not on the other.

The only thing I can do to punish my DS is take away electronics.  He doesn't have much else that I can punish him with. As other Posters have said, time outs really don't work on an 8 yr old. So, if I only take away electronics for serious offenses, that punishment is no different than the punishment he gets for other bad behavior that is not as serious as stealing $. So, DS wouldn't learn the seriousness of certain actions.
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