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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Room inspections are an at least weekly, sometimes daily if needed, thing at my house. [/quote]
Holy shit, I would have run away from home if you were my mom.[/quote]

Thank you for the feedback. That is concerning to me, as it is not at all the atmosphere I want, so I might have to reevaluate what I’m doing here. Could I ask you for your thoughts and advice?

I don’t have teens yet (there’s a typo in my post and ‘teen’ should have read ‘tween boy’s room’, so maybe expectations change as you get older and this will no longer be appropriate soon, or maybe my use of the phrase “room inspection” caused you to think this is far more than what I mean it as. I don’t ever search their things, but I do spend somewhere in the neighborhood of thirty seconds to a minute glancing in the room to make sure the kids’ chores are done and there’s no food in there. I rarely have any problems that I deem significant enough to have them even go upstairs and redo part of the room that isn't tidy; I basically just want to see some semblance of order in there to show that they respect their stuff and to foster good organizational habits for as they get older.

I am honestly interested in your thoughts as to whether and why this is overbearing. I wouldn't want to ruin my relationship with my kids for anything, so even if I firmly believe that an orderly room/house helps lead to an orderly mind and a more peaceful life I would be willing to reconsider checking on their rooms each week if it is truly going to cause a huge problem.

If you don’t take a look in their rooms on a somewhat regular basis, how do you (or do you) verify that chores are being completed such as tidying up their space, vacuuming, and getting rid of the trash? Is this partial list of chores no longer appropriate for tween or teen aged kids, or should I simply be able to trust by now that they will do what they are expected to without me checking up on them?

Thanks in advance to anyone who shares their advice, I appreciate btdt wisdom.
[/quote]

16:45 here.  Honestly, that one little "w" makes a lot of difference.  :D  Tweens are still at an age where you need to stay on top of them a little, and poking your head into their rooms for a quick look-see to make sure they haven't descended into squalor is perfectly appropriate, even into the teen years.

That said, your OP did come across as a *little* overbearing - it brought images to mind of a military-style inspection, with the kids lined up at attention ready to present their hands for a fingernail check.   :D [/quote]

Oh, good. Thanks for clarifying that I'm not totally messing up here. Sorry my phrasing was misleading - it's a carryover from when I was raised with basically the same weekly-ish room check and we always called it 'room inspection' (although now that I think about it I'm pretty sure that was a joke originally...) so that's what I still call it. And LOL, goodness no on the military style or fingernails: even [b]I[/b] wouldn't pass that one, so there's no way the kids would...[/quote]

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