Reply to TTC friend has cut me off

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "TTC friend has cut me off"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=maril332]I'm on OP's side. Her friend does not have to act like she's the first person in the world to have issues in life. Ignoring good friends doesn't make it easier. [/quote]

I have to agree.  I have secondary infertility and missing out on my friends' new children is anathema to me.  I choose to think of it as an opportunity to flex my maternal side and grow the love around me, even if it isn't in the way I had imagined.  I understand the pain people go through, but it is hard for me to understand what is gained by isolating oneself and pushing away people who want to love and support you.  I have found that talking frankly about our situation has helped immensely, and that far from being "insensitive," my friends have proven themselves to be amazingly sensitive, gracious, and supportive.  [/quote]

I'm sorry but secondary infertility is different from not being able to have any children at all.  You really don't understand that?[/quote]

I almost think it would be worse for the person with secondary infertility because they [u]actually know[/u] what it's like to create life and be a parent.  People with primary infertility are wallowing in self-imposed misery about a concept that is completely abstract to them.  I feel worse for the person who actually knows what it's like, chooses to do it again, and can not.[/quote]

I'm the secondary IF poster and while I appreciate your thoughts, I have to say that worse is sort of a useless concept when dealing with infertility.  Every single couple I've met in Resolve has different issues and challenges and every story is heartbreaking.  Regardless of whether it's primary or secondary, we are all struggling to come to terms with a future that may be wildly different than what we'd hoped for and envisioned.  We are all faced with painful and nearly impossible choices.  I admire each and every one of them for having the strength to come forward and share what they are going through with others.  So I guess that's been my point all along.  Shutting yourself away from friends and family is not going to help.  You can't avoid every child and every pregnant person in the world.  You have to find safe supportive places where you can share your feelings and what you are going through.  If you can't do that with friends well, who can you do it with?  And when you let yourself get to the place where you resent your friends or your family for having kids, that is a dark place.  I've heard some stories like that, and it makes me sad.  It's no way to live, no matter what you are going through.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics