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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Sounds like a simple difference of a a planner/communicater vs. a non planner/non communicater. [/quote]

+2.  This is something I navigate every time I start a new job.  What is important to my supervisors/colleagues?  How do they like me to communicate with them?  How frequently?  Your relationship with future DIL and the family will be helped when you have a better idea (and vice versa).

OP, you need to figure out - if you sent the "I found a great navy dress, if that's ok with you both, I'd like to buy it" email, would that be:

(1) welcome (because bride and MOB either don't care, or will be happy to know you chose navy, or because MOB's favorite color is navy and she'll be glad for the chance to respond, "anything but navy please, that's the color I was hoping to wear"), or

(2) premature (because bride and MOB will have an opinion, but they don't want to be pushed into a decision yet).

If #1, send that email, or else call. If #2, then hold off.  Btw, I disagree with the "go through your son" advice on the topic of a dress - he probably couldn't care less!

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