Reply to My in laws just told my husband that we have to take DD to church to show her off

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, look at things in a different light.

You might feel you are being gracious by offering to come hang out before or after the service so that they can introduce your child to their church family.

But based off common ettiquit surrounding Christmas Mass or Protestant services, that behavior would be considered very weird and unusual, and would likely feel to your inlaws feel like they were drawing unnecessary and conspicuous attention to themselves (I know, a big contradiction considering that attention is why they want thier grandchild there in the first place.)

No one, and I mean no one, just shows up before or after and leaves.  That would be very strange and you would be better not going at all.

We do not have family around, so we are always on our own at Christmas.  But we do attend church regularly.  At Christmas mass, the pews aee filled with families.  We see all the regulars, who are usually on their own, sitting in a pew filled from end to end, with their teens and college kids who come from this one day each year, older married kids and the inlaws (often not practicing or Christian as they usually just sit politely instead of participating, knealing, etc.) And grandkids, some familiar with Mass, most not, and some too little to care.

All of these old folks who are usually alone each week are just beaming with pride at having their family with them that day.

It is not about converting or imposing beliefs on unwilling dils, it is about having thier lived ones together with them in a place that is so important to them.

Attendance of your daughter is a wonderful gift you can give your inlaws, even if you stay home and your husband goes.

Some day 20+years down the road, you might be the one where everything important to you is being rejected by the baby you are holding now.  Teaching her from the beginning to respect family traditions is a wonderful lesson you can give her now that will pay off dividends to you decades in the future.
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