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[quote=Anonymous]If this were my family I would explain to MIL that on the advice of the lactation consultant (went to a bf class), and the parenting books, I plan to hold my baby as much as possible, especially in the hospital, so we can form a bond. I would point out that many nursing moms inadvertently hold their babies only when nursing so getting in some bonding time is good for both. I would (as this is my personality) throw in a little something to indicate that as an inexperienced FTM I'm going to do what the books tell me to do even if it seems silly.

If that didn't work, DH would step in and talk to her.

My mother was with us a lot in the weeks after ds was born. I was so impressed with her! She always ASKED if she could hold the baby, or ASKED if I wanted her to take him when he was crying and I couldn't console him (she had a way of calming him, which was weird because she was so not nurturing when I was growing up). Otherwise she mainly cleaned and cooked and did our laundry, which is what she insisted on. All day long "do you have any more laundry for me? I don't want to sit around watching TV all day."

My FIL on the other hand, bah. As soon as he would walk in the door, he would hold out his arms to take my baby. Once when in a room-full of well-wishers (and baby-holders) he took the baby into another room to sit in a rocking chair with him. DH had to go in to take ds back, and tell him "there's other people who came just to see the baby."

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