Reply to I thought I'd made a new friend, but I guess I did not. Middle-age is rough.

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Reply to "I thought I'd made a new friend, but I guess I did not. Middle-age is rough."

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why on earth are you faulting your new friend, if you know she didn't know about the party???

I feel DCUM has been overrun with stupid posts recently. Maybe they're all AI.

[/quote]

Did you read the post? Nobody is faulting the friend.[/quote]

Wrong. OP is suggesting the “new friend” should have told her she wished she’d been invited by the other woman to the party.  As a result, she’s worried that the “new friend” just sees her as an acquaintance.

OP needs thicker skin or she’ll go through the rest of her life obsessing over various slights, real or imagined. [/quote]

This. OP would be expecting birthday person to fault the host. Find blame for jow they managed a surprise party. OMG.[/quote]

It doesn't sound to OP like she expected the friend to fault the host for not inviting OP. OP acknowledges that she doesn't know the host at all, so would not have expected an invite from her.

OP is merely wondering if the fact that the friend didn't seem to care that OP was not at the birthday indicates that the friendship is more casual or not as close as OP thought.

Likely there is an expectations mismatch here, where OP would definitely invite this person to her birthday party or be sad if she had a party and this person was not there. The other person might not feel the same way. It can be awkward or sad to realize this kind of mismatch exists. That doesn't make OP or the friend a bad person, it just can sting a bit.[/quote]

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