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[quote=Anonymous]So my mom was ready to move but overwhelmed. I did everything. You will have to do this in several stages.

0) step zero: make sure you are POA and have all banking insurance social security etc information. Copies of wills, etc.  If they have stopped driving and have cars, get them to go with you to dealer to sell them and sign over title. We sold my mom's car and got a nice chunk of change to help with the move.

1) visit the AL with your parents, get on a list, make a deposit (usually you can get back, but it holds your spot). If you can get them to agree on a move in date, tell them you will handle everything about the move. (or hire someone who will).   If I were you I would make sure that the AL has a full suite of medical practices available to them--visiiting doctors, dentists, podiatrists, etc. They may want to keep seeing their doctors but at a certain point it will be easier to use the ones who make house calls.

2) Move them into the AL. Dont worry about packing too much ahead of time, they will not be able to handle on their own. Have them choose the furniture etc but make sure it fits, and have movers come and pack and move in a day. The longer this stretches out the harder it will be for them. My mom actually moved across country so we just sent out personal items and some art. I bought new furniture and cookware for her (spoiler, she never even used the coffee maker). They will want personal items, etc. Tell them that they'd not have to do it all at once, the house will still be there and they can go back and get more things to ease decision street, but ensure that you get them into their new place and settled quickly.  Give them a month to think about things that they may want while you prep for the next stages.  If they have tons and tons of stuff and mixed paperwork, consider hiring an organizer who specializes in downsizing.

3) Once they are in, ensure that you find someplace to put away valuables that they or you and siblings want to keep. maybe a small storage facility for "we dont know but we/they might want it". While most things are not as valuable as you think, dont rush if your parents have nice things (I did and deeply regret it--once I saw the stuff the estate company sold for 200$ being resold at auction for 10k). Call a local auction company if they do have nice things and no one wants it.. For the rest, use a company like caring transitions, they will handle selling and donating the junkier stuff.

4) Engage a real estate agent during step 3, and get advice on selling as is/what repairs may need to be made/whether staging etc would help. If the parents have huge capital gains significantly exceeding 500k, consider whether renting is better and feasible, otherwise sell the house.

You will pay people to do things quickly that you or they could do slowly and generally it will be worth it,even if some mistakes are made. Making decisions about what to keep/how to move is overwhelming for anyone, and for older people it is often completely paralyzing. Have them focus on the future and next steps, and not worry about how to get there.

One gift to you will be that when your parents either have a medical crisis or inevitably pass, a lot of this stuff has already been dealt with.

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