Reply to Can I charge my hourly rate for helping parent?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP I am sorry some peolle are being so mean to you.  It’s obvious to me that you love your dad.  I ageee it’s not fair you are taking such a financial hit.  It’s fine that lots of people do this for free for their family members —- their parent may not have money to pay, or they may be an only child that will eventually inherit everything.  But let’s say OP’s dad has $300K  saved up that will not be needed for his own care.  At his death, it is divided equally between the three kids.  But OP has spent more like $200K in her time and funds to care for him.  Is it hair do nothing sibling gets $100K when OP has to tell her kids “no money for the college you want…”. No it is not and her good sibling and dad agree.

I have a sibling that is under employed and taking on more of the work of caring for my mom.  I really would LIkE to pay him as I feel like maybe he’d get more work if he didn’t have to care for mom, and I am worried about his own lack of retirement savings.  I wish he would take the money.  Instead I get mom meal gift cards and she treats him as a thanks.

I agree with PPs that you should document and try your good sibling yo sign off on expenses (maybe monthly?) so you don’t end up with bad sibling accusing you of elder abuse/theft.  And if there are more big tasks (like cleaning out an apartment) that could be outsourced for a lower hourly rate, you should consider that.

Also note that estate executors get paid for a lot of this stuff out of the estate funds if they do it after death.  No reason why OP shouldn’t be paid for doing this stuff prior to death.  [/quote]

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