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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Crying, screaming, and even hitting are developmentally normal at certain ages so it is hard to tell given the vagueness what is normal/not and what is just a developmental stage/personality/a problem.

Swearing is not, and I would say cursing/swearing reveals something more about your friends than anything else. Plenty of people can come off as put together or normal parents but might go home and be completely out of control — cursing at their kids, berating them, and otherwise being emotionally or physically abused.

Their “good” kids don’t tell you anything — I was a “good” kid to emotionally immature parents because I knew making a “mistake” (being a normal child) would end in abuse for me. My parents were always complimented on being excellent parents and came off as normal but they were terrible at home. My older brother — with severe behavioral issues, who drinks, swears, has issues with domestic violence, really tells the truth of what was going on in my house.

Modeling is the answer here. Smack your kid and yell/berate/curse at them? You’ve just normalized that for the rest of their lives[/quote]

The kid is 10, not 2-3. [/quote]

NP here: that is the case sometimes unfortunately and it’s not seen from the outside. My kid has some mild special needs so that predisposes them further. From the outside we are a great family. Well, behind closed doors the dad yells, swears, throws things at spouse and kid.  Not enough for the mom to get full custody though. So this is where said kid learns this stuff. Kid speaks that way at school but dad will never admit it. I hope they don’t end up like your brother but they might. [/quote]

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